Day 31: Hits from above

by Sarah Devika Sumnauth

Sometimes I feel like Urban Minerals is evolving without me.  Or maybe with me but ten steps ahead of me.  In either case it’s been acting like an over-achiever lately.  I love it and am scared by it.

It seems that this little sole proprietorship (which means that I’m the only one here) wants to branch out and get into the game but is acting both OCD and scatterbrained at the same time.  I find myself taking time to work on specific things along the way but then the concept changes and morphs into something that I’m not necessarily planning for.  It’s driving me insane.  Or rather driving me to be my best self.

I feel as though all of my ambitions and skills are being funneled into this endeavour, which is a wonderful thing, but I am also not so sure what to do first.  Like a lot of entrepreneurs, I get hits of inspiration all of the time, in the shower, when I’m making breakfast, or anytime I’m relaxed and it would seem anytime, deliberately, when I’m not thinking about the business at all, to do something new, or to hone a part of the business that I had kind of become happy with. 

What does it all mean?  Not sure.  Will I ever know?  Maybe not.  Is this the fun part of it?  Who the hell knows, but sometimes I just have to laugh at myself, and at the divine guidance I’m getting on the regular, because the more I get, the more it makes sense, in an all over the place kind of way.  I’m sometimes transported back to my childhood, to the moments when I would get caught sneaking lipstick, or the moments when my older sisters started asking me to do their makeup, and it’s these moments, the dredged up ones, that show me that maybe I am doing the right things.  I just haven’t got a linear progression figured out yet.  And that’s ok. 

So here, try this one on for size.

Maybe all of these little inspirations and unravellings are just the unfolding of all of my dreams and it took working towards one greater goal to get the rest of them to show their beautiful, stubborn faces…I may never know, but I can hope that by taking their cue, I find out where I want to go…